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Welcome to my Newsletter - Monday Morning Motivations (MMM) - Article #12:

Boost Your Confidence: Learn to Speak Up in Meetings

May 15, 2023

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I'm sure you've heard the phrase "knowledge is power," but what about "communication is key"? In today's world, it's not just about what you know, but also how effectively you can communicate it. And one of the areas where this is most apparent is in meetings.

I remember when I was a graduate in a big bank. I knew my work inside out, but I found it challenging to speak up in meetings especially when there were a lot of senior people speaking. I found that not speaking up at meetings was impacting my career when my boss gave me feedback that I "needed to speak up more" especially in meetings with stakeholders.

Meetings can be intimidating. There's no denying it. You have your boss and your colleagues all in one room, and every time you speak up, it feels like you're under a microscope. Studies show that public speaking is the number one fear most people have, even surpassing the fear of death! But don't worry, it's completely normal to feel this way. Our brains are wired to fear being separated from the pack, and speaking up in a meeting can make us feel vulnerable.

However, letting that fear hold you back can potentially impact your career. Managers are constantly making judgments about their employees during meetings, and if you're not contributing, you're not making an impression. But don't worry, speaking up doesn't mean you have to give a big speech every time. In this newsletter, we'll show you how to confidently share your ideas, ask insightful questions, and make an impact without grandstanding.

Step into the Spotlight

Do you ever have a great idea or a burning question in a meeting, but feel too nervous to speak up? We've all been there. But here's the thing - holding back can actually hurt your career. You don't want someone else to steal your thunder and get all the credit for your idea, right?

You don't have to be a natural-born speaker or a motivational guru like Anthony Robbins. All you need is the willingness to learn and the confidence to speak up. With a little practice and guidance, you can sound and look your best, and people will understand and appreciate your ideas.

Start with a Question

A simple trick to help you ease into speaking up is asking a question. It doesn't have to be earth-shattering or genius-level. Just a simple question related to the topic being discussed. The goal here is to get you comfortable with speaking in front of a group of people, so you don't feel that fight-or-flight response kicking in.

Before your next meeting, take a few minutes to jot down three or four questions you could ask. Having questions ready can help you gain confidence and spark a productive discussion. Remember, it's not about being the smartest person in the room; it's about contributing to the conversation and making your presence felt.

Take Notes

Jotting down key points and ideas during the meeting not only shows good etiquette, but it also aids with memory retention. If you have questions or want to add your own thoughts, write them down too, but keep it brief. You don't want to be flipping through pages of notes during the meeting.

Instead, try to condense your notes onto a single sheet of paper. Write out your questions or ideas in your own words and refer to them if you need to during the meeting. Just remember not to read whole sentences or paragraphs - keep it concise and to the point.

Speak with Confidence

When it comes to speaking up, it's crucial to come across as natural and relaxed. You don't want to sound like you're reading from a script or appear too rehearsed. Instead, aim to sound conversational, as if you're having a casual chat with a colleague.

Sounding natural and relaxed is key. Even if you're speaking in front of thousands of people, a conversational tone will come across better than a rehearsed script. So, don't worry about memorizing everything. Just focus on thinking and talking at the same time. Yes, you might stumble over a word or two, but that's perfectly fine. What's important is that you come across as confident and sure of yourself. You want people to see that you're thinking and talking with conviction.

The Fear of Asking a 'Dumb' Question

There's a chance you might be hesitant to speak up because you're worried about asking a 'dumb' question. While it's true that there's a small risk of being perceived that way, it's important to consider the bigger picture. If you never speak up, you run the risk of being seen as uninterested and lacking in leadership potential. Managers and executives are always sizing up the group and taking note of who contributes and who doesn't. So, don't let the fear of asking a silly question hold you back from sharing your insights and demonstrating your potential for leadership.

Be Yourself, But Better

When speaking to a group, no matter how small, it can be nerve-wracking. But remember, people are watching you and forming opinions based on how you present yourself. If you appear timid or uncertain, they may doubt the value of your ideas. So it's important to exude confidence in your style, without being fake or over-the-top.

When it comes to public speaking, it's important to find your own style and not try to imitate famous speakers like Ronald Reagan or Oprah Winfrey. The key is to speak confidently and clearly enough for your audience to hear you. Don't rush through your words, take your time and speak at a pace that's comfortable for both you and your listeners. And if you make a mistake, don't worry about it too much. Correct yourself and keep going without drawing too much attention to the error.

The Unconscious Mind

It's amazing how much of our behavior is driven by our unconscious mind. So, when you start speaking out at meetings, there may be some nerves and uncertainty that you're not even aware of. But don't worry, I'm going to share some tricks to help you appear confident. We're not trying to pull a fast one on anyone, we just want your audience to focus on what you're saying, not on your nerves.

Practise Makes Perfect

Have you ever noticed that the more you practice something, the more confident you become? It's true! The more you do it, the easier it gets, and the less nervous you feel. When you feel comfortable, you perform better. That's why having confidence is so important.

While it might not be easy to just say "be confident," we've got some exercises that will definitely help boost your confidence. In fact, unlike golf, where more practice doesn't always make you better, speaking out at meetings is a skill that can be improved with time and practice.

Final thoughts

If you want to make an impression in your meetings, it's time to step up and speak out. With the right mindset, a bit of preparation, and a dash of courage, you can overcome your fear of public speaking and present your ideas with authority and confidence. Remember, it's not about being the loudest or the most eloquent speaker; it's about sharing your ideas in a clear and confident manner. So, let's get started and make sure you never miss an opportunity to shine in a meeting again!

Until next time, remember: Your voice matters. Make it heard.

If you have any feedback or have more ideas on what type of career guides you would like to read about from my 20+ years of experience, reply to this email to let me know.

Cheers,

Jonathan Chan

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